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Below are the 18 most recent journal entries recorded in Ben Hobart's LiveJournal:

Saturday, October 15th, 2005
1:39 am
Wednesday, May 26th, 2004
10:33 pm
What's going on?

Not much, but I thought I'd update.

I need to hang out with people more, and not stay locked in with the books for so long. I haven't even hung out with Mallory in a while! She's trying out for cheerleading. I never saw it coming. Not that there's anything wrong with her wanting to try new things, but, cheerleading is like a Shawna-type thing. I hope it doesn't change her, I like Mal the way that she is now.

I'm planning to hang with Al later this week, so we can hang out and catch up. He said something in his email about Abby, and I wonder what's going on there. I'm also going to Jessi's dance recital soon. There's even going to be a BBQ afterwards. I haven't spoken to her much at all this year, and that's kind of bad. I'll be sure to talk to her a bit more from now on.

And what's been up with Byron lately? I've hardly even seen the guy in months. Maybe I'll ask Mal if anything is up with him.

That's it for now. Later!
Thursday, May 13th, 2004
10:10 pm
After a break, I return to online posting.

Nothing much to say right now, except that everything has calmed down, grades are high, and I am over Shawna. That was a really stupid time, and I'm just glad that that is over.

More later. Got to help James with something.
Tuesday, March 9th, 2004
7:24 pm
Hmm.

Last weekend was good, as I got to spend time with both Mallory and Alan.

STILL stressed out with school, music, baseball, the Krushers, and All-State.

I need a break for all of this, but one doesn't seem to be coming fast enough.

One word sums this all up: Meh.

I think I just need some excitement in my life, something different than the norm.

And no, I'm not talking about Shawna.

Oh well, I'll think about it later. Math homework awaits.
Monday, February 23rd, 2004
1:45 am
Birthday Boy!
Quick post before bed:

Things are going well.

-Mallory is awesome, and the best mate a guy could have.

-Alan is great, too. I'm glad that he's my mate now.

-My birthday was today, and I had a good day at home with the family. I got presents from my parents and James. James bought me a box of clarinet reeds, and my parents bought that Dance Dance Revolution game for me (well, all of us). That game looks strange, but is SO much fun! Hmm, I wonder if Mallory will want to play sometime?

Got to run now. More of an update to come soon.
Sunday, February 15th, 2004
3:25 pm
Umm, I'd just like to say that Alan Gray is really cool. Al listened to me vent about what's been happening lately with Shawna, and we had a good talk. I'm feeling better than I have in a while.

He's a cool guy, and I'm glad to have him as my friend, and that he considers me a friend.

Al just needs to stop trying the to imitate my accent, he just can't do it!

Other than that, I've just been working (with a bit of relaxing thrown in), practicing, and will be hanging out with Mal later on today.

I'm glad that life is getting better, finally.
Sunday, February 8th, 2004
9:48 pm
Life sucks
Okay, so Shawna DOESN'T like me.

Apparently it was all a game for her, she was just high and it didn't mean anything to her.

Well, it meant a lot to ME. I feel crushed, and don't know what to do about it.

I mean I should've seen it coming. She's a pretty, popular senior, and I'm just some guy with a funny voice who's a big geek.

I'll get over this (and her) soon, I know, but I just feel so STUPID, you know?

I took pot and hooked up with her. That is so not like me. What would James think of me if he knew? He looks up to me so much.

Well, I learned my lesson. No more pot, no more chasing after girls that I have no business being with, and getting back to things that matter:

Training and playing baseball, keeping my grades up, practicing for SHS orchestra and All-State Band, and hanging out with my best mate Mal.

Mallory. I feel like such a jerk, I've barely spoken to her in weeks, all because I've been caught up with Shawna. Maybe I can talk to her about this, but I don't want her opinion to fall of me.

And maybe she's notice what a jerk I've been and wouldn't speak to me, anyways.

You REALLY screwed up this time, Hobart. BIG time.

How could I be so stupid to think Shawna liked me, to take pot, and to ignore baseball and my friends?

I think I need a rest, and to get my act back together.
Sunday, February 1st, 2004
2:22 pm
Okay, big stuff -

I went to this party at Hannah Toce's house with Tiffany Kilbourne. Now, I don't hang out with that crowd at all, but Tiffany wanted to go, and I wanted to see Shawna again.

During the course of the evening -

- Tiffany left with Alan Gray. I feel bad about leaving her alone like that at the party.

- I smoked some, um illegal substances. I've never done it before, and I never plan to again. I sucked, it affected me badly, and I felt so sick after getting back home. I only did it to impress Shawna. Thankfully, I was able to avoid my parents for most of the weekend. I'm sure they don't suspect a thing. James, on the other had, does, I'm pretty sure. He's does directing and acting; he's good at telling things. I think he's just trying to come up with how to ask me best.

- I hooked up with Shawna last night! It was while we were both high, so I don't know what to make of it. At any rate, I hope that she feels the same way about me that I do about her, but there's a pretty good chance of it, I think!

I won't be in school on Monday, due to me ducking out of school to go to the Stamford Arts and Performing Academy with James and my parents (and conveniently missing the drug test, whew). Having such good grades and stuff really helps when you want your parents to excuse you from school. See, I AM a dork. I don't just skip, I get an excuse. I only did that stuff to impress a girl.

Too much stuff happening now, and it's confusing and jumbled, even more so than this journal entry is!

Hopefully, I'll be able answer whatever questions James comes up with, and be able to talk with Shawna when I get back to school on Tuesday to see if we have an relationship, and where it is going.

And all of this without even worrying about if I made the baseball team or not!!!

Thank GOODNESS no one else can read this!!
Saturday, January 24th, 2004
2:31 am
Stress from things are getting to me. Music, keeping my GPA up, training for baseball tryouts in a week, and other things all at the same time.

On to the big stuff -

Okay, so Shawna called me awhile ago, saying that she thought that I was hot, among other things. The word sex even came up! I was so happy about that, and couldn't wait to see her so that we could talk in person.

I see her at school, and try to talk to her at lunch. She's so pretty, and is always surrounded by her cheerleader friends (AND they're all seniors), and I end up freezing up, not being able to say anything, and stand there like a dork in front of her. I bet they all must be getting a kick out of me.

But what's going on with Shawna?

At times like this I wish that had a close male friend other than James. He's cool, but a bit young.
Wednesday, January 21st, 2004
12:15 am
Oh. My. God.

Shawna called me. Told me I was very hot. AND told me that she "would totally have sex" with me.

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.

More later.
Monday, January 12th, 2004
12:56 am
So, what's been up lately?

- Baseball tryouts are soon. I hope I do well, I've certainly been training enough.

- Speaking of training, it's been very good for me. I'm getting some good definition in my body from it, especially in my legs and calves I should get James involved, too. He doesn't play sports a lot, but it'd be great to do together. He and Lindsay are still going out, and I'm happy for the two of them.

- All State music is HARD! I've been practicing it a lot, though. I bet the orchestra music that Anna is working on must be even harder, but she can handle it.

- Math project with Shawna. Okay, not only is Shawna cool, older, blonde, and pretty, but she's a good worker, too. I'm so used to having partners who do nothing and make me do all the work. She works on what she does know, and has me explain to her what she doesn't. She even seems to understand me when I explain things to her.

- I seem to be getting quite the crush on Shawna is just getting deeper. I dunno what to do about it, or even if I should do anything at all. She is a senior, after all, and I'm just a lowly sophomore.

- I'm talking to Mal more again, which is nice. I kind of lost touch with her over the holidays, but we had a pretty good conversation over the phone a while ago. I'm really lucky to have such a good friend as Mal is.
Thursday, December 18th, 2003
11:55 pm
Things are going great for a certain Mr. Ben Hobart lately!

1 - I placed 13th in the state in All State! And I get to sit first chair third clarinet!

2 - I'm getting better and better at cooking, with Byron's help. It's fun cooking now, now with Byron being such a good bloke in class, the stuff I make tasting good, and the help of the girls in the class. I ask for salt, and I get a shaker handed to me so fast. I love that class. Even the teacher is giving me compliments. The next step is to try something out on the family. I think I'll ask Byron what can I make, and I'll get Dada and James to try it.

3 - I get to work with Shawna on a project for PreCalculus. That means I'll get to see her during break as well. Something seems to be bothering her lately, though. Maybe I can cheer her up somehow? I dunno. This could be my big chance to talk with her, but I'm shy around her.

4 - My video game night is on Saturday. It'll be good to kick back and relax for awhile.

Hooray for All State! I wonder how Anna did, though...
Sunday, December 14th, 2003
4:11 pm
Alright, so All-State Auditions are over! I think I did well, but am just waiting to hear back on how I did. Anna drove us both to Stamford High School for them after the Stoneybrook Orchestra concert that morning. It was a good day, and I got to talk to some of the other clarinet players from around the state. Good stuff. Unfortunately, we ran in Andrew DeBarry there, as well. I barely know him, but Anna seemed put out that he was there. Thankfully, no violence took place. It was Anna there after all, not Abby! (Heh, Abby'd KILL me if she heard me said that!)

Now, the panic sets in.

Why? I need a partner for my math project. I should've asked around last week, but I was too distracted by All State auditions. I really want to keep my A in that class, so I posted on the message board asking if anyone is in the class and would like to help me.

I hope that Shawna needs a partner. She's in my class! It would be bonzer to work with her. I can't describe in words how I feel about her, but she's just perfect. Also, the project is due right after we get back from winter break, so it would give me excuses to see her all break.

Please Shawna, don't be partnered up!
Sunday, December 7th, 2003
2:39 am
Shawna
There's this really great girl at school that I've got my eye on. She just joined the message board that I use a lot recently. Her name is Shawna. She's thin and blonde and pretty. VERY pretty. However, she's ALSO a senior. It's not like she's ever notice me, not a million years. I play in orchestra, she's a cheerleader. She's very popular, I'm a shy guy who's not even from this country. Not exactly the perfect match, are we?

What should I do? How can I get her to notice me?
Thursday, December 4th, 2003
11:30 pm
Well, things have been going well lately, as always seems to be the case for me. Working with Kristy and her Krushers is bonzer. Those kids really love to play, and it's great to be helping out.

School is going well for me as usual. I may not be the brightest bulb in the box, but I do work hard. I'm getting my usual A's in everything. Well, not in Home Ec of course, but my grade is going up due to Byron's help. Studying with Mal for Lit class has helped my grades stay high in that class, too. Those Pikes, they're quite amazing.

All-State auditions are coming up soon, also. Anna Stevenson and I have been working hard on our music, and I'm sure we'll do fine. Especially Anna, she's one of the best violin players that I've ever heard below college age

Well, it's time for me to exercise a bit before bed. G'night
Wednesday, November 26th, 2003
10:08 pm
Life of Ben -

Things have been going well, nothing bad to report, thank goodness. Highlights of the past week:

-Anna is going to audition with me for All State this year! I'm really happy about that. It would've been so intimidating, for my first time, going there without anyone that I know with me. I got the music, as well as the violin music for her. Wish us luck!

-Looks like James and Lindsay DeWitt are an item. James would never admit it, though. You should see how cute the two of them are together, and how on edge James in if I even say her name around him. And I certainly like to do that! As his older bro, I've gotta rib him a bit, y'know?

- I'm going to take over coaching Kristy's Krushers when Kristy leaves next year. I'm attending practices with the Krushers on Tuesdays to help with the transition. I'm glad that Kristy asked me to coach; it's a great opportunity, and can help me with my own playing, as well.

-Home Ec is going much better. Thanks to partnering up with Byron, my projects are actually becoming edible. I owe so much to him for helping me out. I really want to improve at cooking so I can help my mother out when she's trying to feed all of us men. Lindsay helped my mom with dinner one time and make some remark about how she didn't know how my mom does it for us every night.

The girls in my Home Economics class are really friendly to me, as well. It's rare that I ever have to go to get more seasoning or pans or so much as a spoon, since the girls always seem to have such things in arm's reach, or bring them to me as they pass by. Megan Williams even offered to show me how to knead dough correctly today (I couldn't even do that), but Byron was there, so I just worked with him on the project. It was easier that way, rather than having Megan leave her partner to come help me. Thanks again, Byron!

Byron's been a bit distant lately, like he has something on his mind. Then again, he's usually a bit out of it (in the good way, of course), so that's nothing too odd.

-Mallory is definately my best mate. I hang out with her a lot during the day - we have similar classes and assignments, since we are in the same grade. Sometimes, it's just nice to kick back and spend time with an old friend like Mal is, y'know? Heh, what is it with those Pikes? The two of them are such good people.

Well, that's all for now. I have to finish some math homework for tomorrow. G'night!
Monday, November 17th, 2003
12:36 am
Lately, I've been very busy. Playing in orchestra, training for sports, doing homework, all of it keeps a bloke busy, y'know?

Home life is going well. James is really getting into his theater class. He's directing the show that they're going to put on. And that's all I know. He's trying to keep it a secret. I'll get it out of him eventually. I'm his big brother, after all!

I've also spent good amount of time with my mate Mallory lately. We had quite a good discussion over pizza the other day after school. Catching each other up on our lives, and just generally chatting. Saturday during the day, we went out, taking pictures of things all over town. I got a few of Mallory, but I also quite a few of very good nature scenes. Some are very good shots that I'll have to develop as soon as I get a chance to. Maybe I'll post some here, if I figure that out.
Wednesday, November 12th, 2003
12:43 am
Ben here
It's great to have a journal finally to keep my thoughts straight.

School - Well, it's my sophomore year here at Stoneybrook High school. Plenty of classes to fill the day. I got second chair in orchestra, which is good. Rachel Lewis (who is playing first chair) is very good, but is a senior. Hopefully, I'll get that chair next year.

Family - Mathew and James are now at SMS, playing sports as usual. James plays soccer, and Mathew is on the basketball team. Johnny (now John) is at SES, having a bonzer time there.

People at School - Byron seems to a possible good friend. He's going to help me out with home economics this year. I'm a domestic disaster! Other than that, everyone seems to be really friendly. Especially the girls in my home economics class. They're always so helpful when I'm measuring this or needing that. Or trying to be, at least. Byron will probably be of more help, though.

Mallory - Mal's been a best mate of mine since back when we were at SMS. Then, she had to leave to go to that boarding school. Thankfully, she came back, and I'm going to try to spend some time with her, now that she's back.
I had a lot of fun at Homecoming with her and the others. It was kind of cool, being out on a date. I wouldn't have gone otherwise, too. I was glad to do it for Mal, and got a kick out of acting so suavely that night. James thinks that that's a riot, of course.

It's late, and I need to get some sleep. Busy week this week.

--Ben--
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